The Unwelcome Visitor

The unwelcome visitor appeared again today
not even bothering to knock on the door
just sitting there on a low stool as I awoke
staring at me

Following me from room to room on tiptoes
almost making me forget until I went to stand up
grabbing my shoulders then, close, breathing on my face
pushing me down

Standing impossibly tall behind me even now
long tender arms circling my chest
so soft and so warm and so insistent and so unbearably tight
suffocating me

Making me lie down unmovable and stare at the wall
whispering in my ear the same words over and over again
until they become an incoherent persistent hum
drowning my heartbeat

Clutching at my hand when I almost panic
soothing me to sleep again at night with fervent promises
of hopes and dreams and new beginnings for another tomorrow
sitting down again, invisible beside me