Determination

You are power. You are determination. You are the never ever ending grim dirty resolve to reach higher further and broader that even you yourself deem possible. Your home is in that tight dizzying place of endlessly aiming for the impossible, the palpable realization of the clear shimmering vision deep deep inside you.

You cope by only pushing harder. By never giving up. By the easy trick of simply doing the job of ten people and not giving a damn about someone else giving up because you yourself never do. That is who you are, just there pinpointed is the top and the bottom, the core and the edge of who you are, all of you, all you ever were, in one word; more.

It is compulsory, no need to force yourself inhabit it, it happens every single time in every single situation by the simple fact that it is just how you function. There is no other truth possible for you. And so you enhance it, worship it, you make it your worth, your reason, your moral. The definition of yourself.

And so fuck help me god how completely wrecked you hit the bottom that one Tuesday afternoon when all that, all of it, is denied you with one simple word. For an indefinite time with no knowledge, no possibilities, no mercy. From now on no determination, no power, no diligence, no pushing, no reaching, no courage. Not one whiff of yourself.

How to cope with this one small problem of being denied your only way of coping?